Thursday, March 03, 2011

Didn't blog for almost two years!

I can't believe that it has almost been two years since my last post. So much has happened that I wouldn't even know where to start. April 2009, I know I was single and not even thinking of settling down, I wasn't even close to finishing school, and life wasn't that bad. Fast forward two years and I am two classes away from graduating from the top school in the south, I am engaged to be married and I am for the most part really happy. I still work at the same place, and don't plan on changing that until I graduate, but as history has taught me who knows what will happen. Life always has a funny way of throwing you curve balls when you least expect it.

I don't know where to begin, so I'll start with some current events. School is going fine. I had to drop my Operations Management course today because I just couldn't get a grasp of it. I think there should be some type of pre-requisit that you should have to take, I have no idea what it should be, but I wish I would have taken it. To me it was like the class was being taught in another language. I have no idea what Pie over Sigma divided by the Square root of the projected sales even means. Don't get me wrong the class was super interesting, but I didn't know what they were talking about half the time. I did give it the old college try. I went and spoke with the professor and asked for some extra help, but my attempt was futile, it was not meant to be. I know now that I do not want to be a project manager. On a good note, I had my mid-term in my International Buss. development course and I am pretty sure I ACED it! It is a good feeling to take a test and know all of the answers. This class should raise my GPA. I am excited!

I have been feeling so unmotivated lately. I have this tendency to start working out and then just stopping for no apparent reason. I am starting to think that I am lazy. When I work out I feel better, but I just can't talk myself into going to the gym. I even went as far as drawing up a dry erase board with a chart that would track my progress of how much weight I lost and bought a fancy scale that measures my body fat ratio (whatever that is) and just like always for the first week I stayed with it and ran, but after that second week, I don't know, I just kinda stopped doing it. My fat chart looks like a straight line drawn across a board, so sad. I started working out because I just feel unhealthy. To anyone that has been heavy (I have been my whole life) we can tell when we are starting to flirt with the " dude your getting big" voice in our heads. I am complex, I am probably the chubbiest confident person I know. Some people might even say that I carry a bit of arrogance when I walk, what ever, there just jealous. I really want to lose weight, I just wish there was an easier way; if anyone has any good ideas let me know.

I have a lot more to write about but I just don't think I am ready to share everything at the moment. Plus, my fiance and I just had a fight and I think that it is a bad idea for me to write when I am pissed off, in the past it usually leads to more arguing. But I am gonna list some things so that I remember to write about them.

Things to write about in the upcoming weeks.

1. being sober and my experience with A.A.
2. Going back to church and really enjoying it. (life group)
3. How I met Connie
4. Being engaged

That's all I can think of at the moment, I finally have my own laptop computer so hopefully I will start writing on a more regular basis, I feel better when I see my issues written down. My own therapy.